Today's dialogue comes from another novel of mine- a contemporary romantic mystery called- Take Me Now.
When writing this novel I wanted to have smooth, yet light-hearted dialogue as this novel is intended to be a bit of escapism. My heroine, Aela Cameron, is a fiesty lass who knows how to hold a conversation and won't be cowed by the fact that she is speaking to her brand new employer. The fact that it's a temporary contract might have something to do with her flippancy...
Aela Cameron - from Vancouver, Canada - lands herself a temporary job as office assistant and pilot/driver to Nairn Malcolm. Nairn is a man with many business interests who has very recently had a 'strange' motorbike accident. During the job interview, conducted by him far too soon after his accident, Nairn is almost comatose and not completely aware of reality. He is also not quite aware of how inapropriate his conduct has been...
This extract happens the folowing morning-after Aela has been persuaded to stay overnight at Narin's Scottish island castle by Ruaridh, Nairn's father, who is a partner in his son's island boat business. Aela is learning what her job will entail, the parts that are not ferrying Nairn in his floatplane, or in his catamaran between his Scottish island castle and the mainland, from where she will fly his jet to worldwide destinations to conduct his business.
“I do initial consultations for the expensive yachts and
vessels we produce, at venues of the client’s choice, hence the need to travel
so much. Ruaridh handles other negotiations here on Lanera.”
“Okay, got Gale Breakers.” Aela’s mumble came after Nairn
rattled off the last details on Gale Breakers.
Another of Nairn’s companies used worldwide locations for
providing extreme sporting experiences—water based ones like white water
rafting, river tubing, canyoning and different kinds of bungee
jumping. “Adrenalinn Adventuring?” she asked, remembering the name
from her initial searches.
Nairn nodded. An attempt to steeple his fingers failed and
mild curses ensued when his arm cast slipped off the edge of the desk. His
grumpy moans about his ineptitude made her smile. It was gratifying to know the
guy could laugh at himself, and loosen up a bit, though Nairn Malcolm laughing
at himself was just too unsettling.
“I’m impressed, Miss Cameron. How did you know that?”
Her answer was nonchalant. “A little internet research
before coming to Lanera yesterday. Your companies have nice names, and sell
exciting merchandise.”
Nairn’s tight smile acknowledged his appreciation of her
compliment as she continued to jot.
“Adrenalinn Adventuring also provide land based experiences
like tank driving, dirt buggies, quad biking, sphereing, bogshoeing,” he
rattled on.
“Whoa! Whoa! Hold on a minute.” The peremptory, pleading
tone she used stemmed his flow. She’d devised her own system for note taking,
but his lecture was stretching it to the absolute limit. Smiling up at him, an
apologetic grin broke free. “Got my notes in a tangle. Can you backtrack,
please?”
“Do you always take such thorough notes, Miss
Cameron?”
Aela looked to see if he was teasing; his infinitesimal
change of tone implied it as he made proper eye contact with her. How
disconcerting! There was just something there he wasn’t quite masking. A flush
of arousal rippled through her that she squashed, again. It took a moment to
rally her thoughts enough to answer him.
“Initially, till I’ve got the basics,” she said, changing
her pencil during the lull. “Okay, so those last pursuits? Did you say
sphereing?
“Rolling down a hill in a large plastic ball like a
hamster,” Nairn drolly supplied. A hint of a smile broke free, a marginal
twinkle in both of his eyes.
Oh my! Aela’s stomach flipped again. The man was definitely
thawing. Why did his almost-smile have to be so appealing? She remembered the
feel of those lips against her own and wished she hadn’t for she wanted reruns,
and more reruns. But that wasn’t going to happen again. In a contrary way she
didn’t want him to be anything other than a detached employer. Temporary job,
that was all. She determined to keep her tone light and airy. “Yeah! I know
that as zorbing. Tried it in New
Zealand. Fantastic fun.”
“I expect you had lots of experiences on this world trip of
yours, Miss Cameron.”
Nairn’s low husky tones rippled down her backbone: far too
delicious.
“Oh, I did, sir.” She decided she wasn’t rising to his
cryptic bait, sexual or otherwise. Her clarification sounded prim, even to her
own ears. “On my trip I experienced things I wouldn’t have done at home, all
equally exciting. But I’ve never heard of, or tried bogshoeing.”
Please leave a comment on whether you think this dialogue is smooth, or suggestions as to how it could be improved.
My novels are available from amazon, The Wild Rose Press and Crooked{Cat}Publishing.
amazon.com: http://amzn.to/wwaGCv
Book trailer videos for my novels:
Monogamy Twist Youtube trailer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJVzbrkJQzA
Take Me Now Youtube trailer http://youtu.be/stDC4Yhm2r0
The Beltane Choice Youtube trailer http://youtu.be/igJmfBoXRhQ
Slainthe!
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